scarred, lonely, alone, missing ‘home’, confused, angry (at K), in love (w H), missing H, a bit lost, unmoored, worried, scarred of being a dried up old lonely dyke.

I’m really really frightened of this last one. I’ve always been frightened of ending up old and alone. But I don’t think that’s a good reason to compromise on life or two stay in an unhappy marriage.

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