I’m looking forward to feeling freer to indulge my photographic eye.

As it is my camera’s body has been hijacked by my husband to use with his macro lens on his copy stand. Somehow it never gets the lens put back on and it never ends up in my camera bag where he got it from. The end result is I have to ask, each and ever time, if I can use MY camera, the camera I bought myself as a present to myself when my daughter graduated high school. He would have just baulked at the expenditure.

Further more I always end up feeling like I’m doing something I should be ashamed of. I wanted to document my breast cancer. I hid that I was trying to do it as a result the images are far less powerful than they could be. If I’m not taking nice polite postcard type images I feel like I have to hide it. That is just wrong.

I’ve long found the image of a lovely set of legs and a pretty pair of shoes … of a woman on the toilet to be very sexy. Either as seen from under the stall door or from her vantage point or somehow else, panties crumpled around her ankles or sitting up by her knees, in a public restroom or at home… the image is just sexy. It’s somewhere between little girl and woman. Yeah, I’m sure it’s been done a hundred times before but I’d still like to see if I can put my own spin on it.

I love images of women. I like pieces parts and curves. I love abstracts of the human body. I love dismembered portions (like the legs under the stall door). I like images that make you feel like an unseen voyeur. I like images that you have to stop and ask yourself what body part that is.

I’ve been seriously considering waiting tables at a strip club to pad my income. Then the other day I thought about it visually. I thought about the images that can be made of the girls dancing, the macro shots, the image of the long curve of the body on its hands an knees, the headless ass from behind, hair draped forward her back rising from behind her… all bathed in the strong white light from the floor. Now … I do realize the chance that I will get permission to shoot is pretty minimal but my its intriguing.

I’d also like to shoot in a piercing and tattoo shop. That might be easier to get permission to do.

All of this I feel like I can’t do under my husband’s roof. Isn’t that sad?