If the Dismal Swamp had a personification…I would be it today. I am entirely without energy. I am depressed, overwhelmed, and lonely. I feel disconnected, unwanted, unneeded and worthless.  At least I’m not on fire.


I’m struggling with my first feelings of doubt and distrust with C. I’m not surprised it’s a parity issue. At the moment I’m trying to discern how much of it is PMS and how much of it is a genuine issue. I suspect a fair amount of it is PMS given its nature regarding trust or lack of AND given the rest of my affect this morning.


I wonder why my PMS goes to distrust. Some women get agitated and cranky, others get mopey… why do I get paranoid? Why does my mind go to assuming the worst of those I have give my trust to the rest of the month?


I’m sitting here patiently waiting for my second cup of coffee and my Adderall to kick in. Something has got to click soon or today is just really going to suck for no specific reason.